WASHINGTON — For 17-year-old Salek Haseer, video video games are an escape. They’re a means, nevertheless fleeting, to place a pause on his ideas — about fleeing Afghanistan final August, about leaving his father behind and about his new dwelling.
“It’s not like I wish to play the video games,” Haseer stated. “I play to take away my emotions.”
Since resettling in Virginia together with his three siblings and mom, Haseer has struggled with the overwhelming emotional toll the previous 12 months has taken. Grieving separation from his father — who was unable to go away together with his household — he began seeing a psychologist at his college.
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“I inform [the psychologist] that I get some despair too. I miss my father. I can not proceed my life, so I attempt to getting higher emotions,” stated Haseer, who’s a highschool junior. “It’s laborious to me. Generally I say I’m nothing with out my dad.”
Haseer and his household are amongst a wave of Afghans who’ve sought refuge within the U.S. in current months. Whereas there are psychological well being assets out there to Afghan refugees — who had been not too long ago granted momentary protected standing within the U.S. — there are important limitations to accessing that care. There’s additionally, for a lot of, an pressing want for it: Households like Haseer’s are grappling with grief, despair, and post-traumatic stress dysfunction after residing by way of battle and having to go away their houses.
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“The battle, the explosion, all the things — it has put results on each Afghan,” stated 16-year-old Muzamel Kabuli, who left Afghanistan in August together with his mom and 4 brothers and awaited resettlement in a New Jersey navy base earlier than settling down in Maryland. Muzamel witnessed a suicide bombing exterior his college. His brother, Mahdi, has nightmares about Afghanistan like Haseer.
“Generally I dream that I’m in [the middle of] the airport, working to get inside,” stated Mahdi, 18. “And generally I had a dream that I used to be with Muzamel, it’s simply me and him, and we’re attempting to get in, and he will get shot.”

Their mom, Roya Kabuli, is racked with loss after leaving her nation and plenty of of her family members. She misses the brighter style of recent fruit, a neighborhood with mosques close by, and the sound of the Ahdan, broadcast from native mosques to name Muslims to prayer 5 instances a day.
However what she misses essentially the most is the daylight. The massive home windows in her Kabul residence let in daylight all day onto the thick, intricately designed purple rugs adorning the flooring, however her household doesn’t get daylight on the beige partitions of her new Maryland residence till an hour or two earlier than the solar units.
“She says that it was so superb,” Mahdi Kabuli stated, translating his mom’s phrases from Dari. That lack of daylight makes her sadder, she stated. And that makes her bodily issues – diabetes, excessive ldl cholesterol, and recovering from surgical procedure – really feel extra acute. “She thinks most of her ailments are as a result of she’s nervous. Generally she worries lots. Generally she cries,” Mahdi Kabuli stated.
There aren’t good estimates on what number of Afghan refugees wrestle with psychological well being, resembling despair, nervousness, or post-traumatic stress dysfunction, nor are there information but on their entry to psychological well being care within the U.S., although previous stories from the American Psychiatric Affiliation counsel only a few refugees within the U.S. are referred for psychological well being care.
Once they had been ready for resettlement on the navy base, each member of the Kabuli household was informed to see a psychologist. However all of them refused. They don’t know anybody on the base who noticed a psychologist, and have by no means tried to hunt psychological well being care.
“It’s our custom that if we have now an issue, to inform that downside to an individual that we actually know, that we actually care about, that actually cares about us,” Mahdi Kabuli stated. “So we really feel not very snug telling our issues to strangers.”
Consultants say there are lots of cultural elements as to why offering psychological well being providers is more difficult for Afghans, together with a “mismatch” between Western and Afghan methods of fascinated with psychological well being, in accordance Anne Noticed, a psychology professor who research psychological well being fairness for immigrants and refugees at DePaul College. “The methods wherein in America we usually deal with psychological well being problems with one-on-one psychotherapy … is culturally dissonant with many immigrants and refugees. It may be laborious for some people to grasp why you’ll even do this,” Noticed stated. “Generally, it’s in direct opposition with what they’ve been taught of not airing out your issues to individuals you don’t know and even individuals you do know.”
Even telling a beloved one can show overwhelming when that very same particular person is coping with their very own set of challenges. Roya Kabuli worries about her 5 sons, and he or she doesn’t wish to fear them extra. The Kabuli brothers stated that once they’re feeling unhappy, they assist each other. Roya, for her half, tries to lean on her sisters nonetheless in Afghanistan, however Wi-Fi connectivity points make it tough, and she will solely communicate to them about as soon as every week.
“She say that if ‘I communicate to you guys about my downside, it make you unhappy to see, that may have an effect on your research,’ so due to that she doesn’t,” stated Muzamel Kabuli.
Salek Haseer’s brother, Baktash, knew he was grieving his father — within the room they share, he might hear his brother saying his father’s identify in his sleep. “On a regular basis [Salek] is coming to me and asking, what is going to occur to my father? And each evening he’s waking up from mattress and he’s screaming,” Baktash stated. “That’s how I do know he’s fascinated with his father.”
However Salek didn’t really feel snug telling his household that he was looking for assist for greater than a month — he didn’t wish to fear them.

Past the non-public limitations, there are additionally sensible hurdles going through Afghan refugees who search assist. Whereas giant households just like the Kabulis can present built-in assist programs, it additionally makes transportation tough. When Neighborhood Well being, which offers medical care to underserved communities in Virginia, had a half-day devoted to offering medical providers for Afghan refugees, the middle’s outreach program coordinator Laura Gonzalez stated they wanted a number of automobiles only for one household.
“I’ve had a household of 9 earlier than who all want medical providers, who all want psychological well being providers,” Gonzalez stated. “I want we might have them, all 9, come into our workplace on the similar time … but it surely’s inconceivable.”
Not one of the behavioral well being suppliers at Neighborhood Well being, which has a number of clinics in Virginia, communicate the 2 main languages in Afghanistan, Pashto and Dari. A couple of of the first care suppliers do, and the well being middle may also name on interpreters, however that may typically be a problem.
Nevertheless, Neighborhood Well being stated it has discovered success introducing psychological well being as a medical subject through the use of an built-in type of medical care, wherein a major care supplier can test on a affected person’s psychological and bodily well being, earlier than calling in a behavioral well being supplier from one other room if wanted.
“We’re asking questions on nervousness, we’re asking questions on depressive signs within the context of a medical appointment, which a whole lot of instances is much less threatening for sufferers, as a result of it’s one thing that’s acquainted cross-culturally,” stated Courtney Riggle-van Schagen, director of behavioral well being on the middle.
Usually, individuals are available for an preliminary checkup, however they don’t have the capability to come back again for extra complete psychological well being care, stated the Neighborhood Well being consultants. Their sufferers are anxious about placing meals on the desk, enrolling their children into college, or attempting to assist their households nonetheless in Afghanistan, and psychological well being care will get pushed to the tip of the checklist.
“It’s tough for anyone who’s struggling to only acculturate and resettle their household within the midst of ongoing trauma, to assume that it could be worthwhile to spend an hour that they might be working and sending a refund dwelling or working for his or her household right here to cope with their psychological well being,” stated Noticed. “So I believe it’s incumbent on suppliers to promote that, to persuade purchasers that this might be helpful.”
Haseer has solely met together with his college psychologist twice up to now. He’s adjusting to his new life as a U.S. highschool pupil, waking up early and staying up late to complete his homework, and believes the appointments are beginning to deliver reduction within the day, although he continues to undergo from nightmares.
“I see my father,” Haseer stated. “Solely my father.”
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